I've heard stories of portable petting zoos, a Circus-themed party with a ferris wheel and even renting out the famed toy store FAO Schwartz for a sleepover (for a mere $38,000). I don't know anyone who has personally had a children's party of this magnitude so maybe it's just an urban legend or only suitable for the MTV show "My Sweet Sixteen", which by the way, I CANNOT watch because the excess makes me physically ill. Yes, a 16-year-old needs a $100,000 Mercedes, Daddy!
Recently, as Wyatt and I were walking into the local kids' hair salon, we were met with a room full of squealing girls. I'm guessing their ages to be between 3 and 6, with a few younger siblings sprinkled in. They were decked out in all their frilly finest and a few were even wearing high heels. There were varying types of bows, hairbands and tiaras adorning their heads. Their hair was some variation of elaborate braids or pigtails with stripes of every color imaginable in them (temporary dye?) and they were carrying spa-themed goody bags. This got my curiosity, so I picked up a brochure on birthday parties and tucked it into my purse to peruse later. I examined the brochure to find that you can host a Princess-themed mani/pedi party for $200/hour. Seriously? Isn't our culture imaged-obsessed enough? Does it need to start at the ripe old age of three? I was in college before I had my first mani/pedi. Maybe in a few years I'll be eating my words as I'm hosting a Princess-themed party of my own, but it seems a little over the top to me.
Kids are no longer happy with that simplicity that we grew up with. Parties must have pizazz and adventure - an afternoon at the fun zone, ice skating rink, taking a cooking class, learning a magic trick from an expert or a backyard blowout with inflatable bouncy rentals and 25 of your "closest" friends, along with their parents and siblings. And what about the goody bags? They're usually just full of sugary candy and dollar store junk that you have to pitch once you get home anyway. Yes, I'm cynical. I would like to start a movement where we all start to boycott the goody bag. Who's with me?
I have had this discussion with plenty of friends so I know I'm not alone in my thoughts. One girlfriend has a rule that the number of party guests must not exceed your age (you're turning 5, you get 5 party guests, that's it). Now that her oldest is 8, she's realizing she'll have to set a maximum number, but still, it's a good rule. Birthday parties are a never-ending cycle. Once you start throwing the parties, there's a (self-imposed?) expectation that each year must top the last. Some moms are afraid it won't measure up and their child will be disappointed. Why does every birthday have to be marked with such over-the-top celebrating? Why not just throw a party every few years or only on major milestones?
I hope all this soapbox venting doesn't make me sound like a scrooge. My kids know they are loved 365 days a year. We will always celebrate their birthday in a special way - their favorite meal, a cake and a couple of small presents. I'm not saying I'm against parties all together. As they get older, they can invite a few friends or maybe we'll go out and do something fun. Most importantly, we'll always let them know how special they are to us and how much they have blessed our lives. Isn't that really the point anyway?
I'll be curious to hear your comments on this topic. Am I just old fashioned or is this the way of the future?
5 comments:
Here, here Chels. We are fortunate to live in a small town, so the home party with pin the tail on the dinosaur, or pass the parcel are all that's expected. But we have been to a couple with the blow up Castle, and have heard of the petting zoo being rented. I'm not against the goody bag but I am all for a bit of imagination. At Tom's monster birthday, each of the 6 boys (we went over the limit a little bit!) everyone made their own monster mask which they could take home with some lollies/candy as well. Which seemed to go down well. I hate the over the top stuff, home made cake and old fashioned party games for as long as I can get away with it!!
i am soooo in agreement with you!!!...My kids had 1 (ONE) i said ONE! birthday party..when each turned 6 years old...i damn near died..i love kids..but not all in the same room!..i did my due digilence and provided a big (in-house) party with games, cake, and instead of goody bags they each received mcdonald's coupons..lol.. yes..coupon's..at least the parents could use them... as they got older they had an option...2 friends could be invited to either go swimming or to a movie and if the moons aligned they were entitled to have a sleep-over and by mid-morning the next day..they were gone home..lol..does that make me a bad parent??? i think not... my kids are well loved and completely spoiled with other crap like, phones, and gaming crap and snowboarding and skiing and tropical vacations... i truly don't think that they missed out on anything... even when they went to other birthday parties.. my only obligation was to get them there with a nice gift... i can not say they are 18 and almost 15..there birthday party days have changed quite a bit..lol..
Hugs..Char
I agree with you Chels. With Bennett being our first we got into the concept of parties and had a big blowout for her 2nd birthday (which she won't even remember). We're getting smarter now, and only having family. That way they are comfortable the whole time with all of the guests, and know they are loved by everyone there. Although I have to admit, that I have thought the princess party at a local salon could be a fun party for a few of her friends.... It is hard to not get caught up in it all.
I'm with you! Less is more. Madeline helps me make an imperfect cake, we invite over a few friends and make a big mess. That's FUN to me! :) My mom got really creative with all our parties growing up...but I bet she never spent more than $50 from beginning to end. On of my favorites was when she flooded one side of our house before it was sodded and made an obstacle course that went through the mud :) (See what I mean about getting dirty? Ha!).
AMEN! Chelsea. I'm with you. I'm not sure when and how birthday parties got out of hands but they sure have. Even 24 yrs. ago my grand kids had goodie bags to give you at their parties. I just think the birthday person should be made to feel special on "their" day. Their other grandma gave all 3 of them a gift on each of their birthdays! This Grandma refused to do that. I kept saying it isn't their birthday, why should they get a gift??? beyond my thinking anyway. Hold your ground and stick with it.
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