Brotherly Love

There are many ways to prepare for the arrival of a new baby - selecting clothing, preparing the nursery, picking out names - but none is more important than making sure your family is mentally ready. For the most part, we're all quite excited about our upcoming arrival. Of course, Dayven and I are really looking forward to meeting our baby girl. My parents are excited to have a granddaughter. My brother is happy to be an uncle again. I'm fairly certain that Finley will like her. There is one person, however, who is not too keen on adding another member to the clan.

Wyatt is not looking forward to sharing the spotlight, no matter how much we try to convince him that having a baby sister will be fun. Babies are great, Wyatt. I mean, they eat, sleep, poop and cry - what's not to love!? I think he's just hoping the issue will quietly die. No matter how I phrase the question, I always get the same response - an empathic "NO!"

ME: Wyatt, are you ready for a baby sister?
WYATT: NO!!
ME: Aren't you excited to be a big brother?
WYATT: NO!!
Then he thinks about it for a second and adds "Take 'er ta Chuck E Cheese!?"
I tell him, "Of course!" but he still looks skeptical.

We even try to trick him into agreeing that a baby sister is a good idea...



I have all sorts of great memories of being a big sister. My brother Josh was such a happy kid and so eager to please, he usually went along with pretty much any idea I came up with. Once I told him the neighbor's dog, a Pomeranian, was friendly, knowing full well it was NOT. He eagerly raced over to give the dog a hug and came back screaming and crying with a bloody gash. I'm sure I told him on more than one occasion that he was adopted. He was gullible enough to believe it the first time, until he asked my mom for confirmation. Then there was the time I made him laugh so hard doing impersonations that he peed his pants. What can I say? I was a funny kid. Once we were on a long family road trip and Josh decided he had to go number 2 right then and there. My mom told me to empty the snacks out of the large Tupperware she had packed and hold it up for him to poop in. I guess we were in too big of a hurry to pull over. Talk about scarring a kid for life.

I asked Josh what memories he had from childhood, thinking maybe he would offer up some more heartwarming Rockwellian moments. He recalled a time when our parents were out of town and I was instructed to come home from college to keep an eye on him. He says instead I bought him a bunch of beer and wine coolers and took off. Nice role model. He also recalled a particularly devastating conversation we had where I told him that Santa Claus didn't exist and it was in fact, mom and dad. He begged mom to "tell him the real truth" hoping she would convince him that I was crazy, just saying these things out of spite and Santa was real, but she actually told him the truth and the gig was up. It affected him so much, he remembers every detail of their conversation, including the fact that it took place in a parked car outside the post office. Sorry Josh. There was also something about me allegedly locking him in the car with some stinky shoes in the Home Depot parking lot, but this one has escaped my memory. Ah, good times.

He did have a couple of decent memories that made me think having me as a big sister wasn't all bad. Once when some neighborhood kids were having BB gun wars (hello?? Parents!?), they tried to hit Josh, who was not armed, and I went and told them off. He also remembers me showing him how to hang his backpack on the back of our old school desk we used to play with so the kids wouldn't make fun of him on the first day of school. That's something, right?
Although I was the oldest in my family, I think of all the things I learned from my friends' older siblings or from older cousins - how to actually inhale while smoking a cigarette, the usefulness of aerosol hairspray (hey, it was the 80's), how to "act cool" when a boy talks to you, important stuff like that. But not all information is helpful, or accurate, like the very mis-guided information I received on how babies are made. Once, we were camping in the backyard and one of my older cousins told me we had better watch out for raccoons. They try to claw their way into your tent at night and if they do, you're really in trouble because they will scratch your face off. I'm sure I slept with one eye open that night.

I hope that eventually Wyatt and his sister will have a good relationship like my brother and I have and he'll teach her some important life lessons too. I'm sure he'll get more used to the idea once she's here. I mean, what choice does he really have? I believe that a sibling is one of the best gifts you can give your kid. It teaches them compassion, patience, how to share and be helpful and gives them a bond for life.